We had the Greenhalgh kids over for supper the other night. Emily (the oldest who just got married) moved back to Utah for school today, so I’m not sure when/if we’ll see her again (although I would bet that we will). We’ve known the Greenhalgh’s since Chloe was born. Actually if I think about it, it’s been a little longer because they started taking piano lessons from me that previous year when I was still pregnant with Chloe. Either way, it’s been a solid 3-4 years. Who would have guessed, back then, what a part of our lives that family would become.
We’ve watched them go through joys, disappointments, celebrations and painful changes. And through all of this, it’s become clear to Tim and I the important role we play in their lives. They have crossed the line from “one of my piano families” into “friends of the family.” We’ve joked that our kids will grow up thinking that they are all Aunts and Uncles since they are around so much.
As we were hanging out last night I realized we’ve crossed another milestone. We are the adults. I know this sounds obvious, but hear me out. I remember being in high school and going to youth group and looking up to the adults. In particular there was one couple that I have memories of going to their house to hang out and talk. I remember thinking they were so cool. Yet, they also seemed so much older and put together. I was crushed when they got a divorce. My role models crumbled in front of me.
It’s weird to be on the flip side. We are now the adults and yet I can still remember being one of the kids. And more importantly I can remember what I thought about the adults.
Which is what brings me back to the Greenhalgh’s.
It is important to both of us that we are good role models for the Greenhalgh’s. We have been placed in their lives at this time for a reason–I’m sure of it. We have a wonderful and unique opportunity to be a positive influence in their lives. I’m aware that they’re not terribly young anymore, but I don’t think we ever stop needing good role models and grounded people around us.
You are so right.
Very wise post, Erica. Another similar thing I learned the hard way is how much it matters to these slightly younger people what we “adults” think of them and how easily we can hurt them with a flippant comment, even one we meant as a joke. We really do need to be careful to act like adults around them and only act like “kids” around our peers.